Greenpoint listing advertises a tub in the living room — but what to do with it?

To the future tenant: Here's how you can work with that bathtub instead of around it.

November 21, 2019 Brooklyn Eagle Staff
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So you just moved into your new one-bedroom apartment in northern Greenpoint. You’re paying $1,750 in rent (oof), but hey, there are bars nearby, good food, retail — sure, it may be a couple blocks away from a federal Superfund site, but nearby restaurant Oxomoco has a Michelin star! There’s just one other issue: that bathtub in the middle of the living room.

Sound familiar? If so, you may be the person who rented that unit passed around on Twitter and Reddit on Wednesday, the one where the broker, in the listing, passed off this HUGE red flag as “a unique studio with different areas!”

But don’t worry. Reddit may be ridiculing you, but we’re here to support you. From the Brooklyn Eagle, here are some things you can do with your — to borrow a term from the broker — “unique situation.”

  • Dinner party guests show up a little rank? Make them bathe while you fix up the appetizers. Close proximity to the kitchen means you can still keep the conversation flowing!
  • Pack it with damp dirt, plant some mushrooms and cover. Now you’ve got a fresh supply on hand while cooking.
  • Turtle farm.
  • Think of it this way: it’s your very own hot tub, right in your home.
  • Make it your designated “crying space.”
  • Throw some pillows in there and rent it out on Airbnb.
  • Turn it into a fire pit! (Requires open window.)
  • Fill it with jungle juice and throw a banger.
  • Grow some hemp.
  • Dump some rocks and plants in there and make a terrarium. Trendy!

Have more ideas? Leave ’em in the comments.

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