Brooklyn Boro

New memoir explores psychological manipulation of child predators

April 6, 2018 Brooklyn Daily Eagle
Piper Weiss. Photos courtesy of Harper Collins
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In the early 1990s, a shocking scandal shook Manhattan’s Upper East Side when a highly-sought tennis coach was discovered to be a child predator. In her new memoir “You All Grow Up and Leave Me,” which will be released on April 10, author and witness Piper Weiss examines the event as both a teenage eyewitness and a dispassionate investigative reporter. An unsettling blend of true crime and coming-of-age memoir, Piper offers a thoughtful mediation on adolescent obsession and the vulnerability of youth.

Weiss was 14 years old when her middle-aged tennis coach, Gary Wilensky, one of New York City’s most prestigious private instructors, killed himself after a failed attempt to kidnap one of his teenage students. In the aftermath, authorities discovered that this well-known figure among the Upper East Side tennis crowd was actually a frightening child predator, who had built a secret torture chamber — a “cabin of horrors” — in his secluded rental in the Adirondacks.

Before the scandal broke, Piper had been thrilled to be one of “Gary’s Girls.” “Grandpa Gary,” as he was known among his students, was different than other adults. He treated Piper like a grownup, taking her to dinners, engaging in long intimate conversations and sending her special valentines. As reporters swarmed her private community in the wake of Wilensky’s death, Piper learned that her mentor was a predator with a sordid history of child stalking and sexual fetishes. But why did she still feel protective of Wilensky, and why was she disappointed that he hadn’t chosen her?

Now, 20 years later, Piper investigates the case hoping to understand and exorcise the childhood memories that haunt her to this day. Combining research, interviews and personal records, “You All Grow Up and Leave Me” explores the psychological manipulation of child predators — their ability to charm their way into seemingly protected worlds — and the far-reaching effects their actions have on those who trust them most.

The memoir has important real-world implications. In the 20 years since the traumatic event that defined Piper’s childhood, we have seen a proliferation of cases featuring abusive authority figures. “You All Grow Up and Leave Me” examines one such predator, the man who so insidiously and thoroughly infiltrated Piper’s world; and she is fearless in her exploration, revealing the thought-provoking parallels between her own naive obsessions and his distorted fixations, all while showing us exactly what it feels like to be a teenager standing on the sidelines as the truth is revealed.

With successes like “Serial” and “Making a Murderer,” the public appetite for true crime stories is stronger than ever — and Piper’s eerily evocative style perfectly captures the interior world and intense vulnerability of the American teenager, making the overall read as darkly compelling as today’s most popular psychological suspense.

Weiss, a Brooklyn resident, has served as editorial director for HelloGiggles, and as features editor for the New York Daily News and Yahoo, where her original reporting earned international news coverage. She is the author of the book “My Mom, Style Icon,” and her writing has appeared in publications including Glamour, McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, Elle.com, Refinery29, New York magazine and Hazlitt.

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