Etiquette Boss: Out-dated rules

January 29, 2014 Phillipa Morrish
Share this:


In my mother’s day, the image of an etiquette class consisted of little girls walking with heavy books on their heads.

Long before her time, the image of an etiquette class was a group of young male European aristocrats, sent by their parents to learn the protocols of governing countries and entertaining other rulers. Certain lessons that were taught then are no longer followed.

However, there is a catch. In most countries, working class families and “new money” tend to drop etiquette rules faster than the ruling classes, because they are more likely to follow fads and fashion at a faster rate.

Today, I will highlight an etiquette rule regarding gift-giving, that has been dropped by the working class in most countries. I believe that it is still good to know what was the standard rule, because you just might find yourself in a certain sector of society that still adheres to it.

We will look at the “once adhered to” rule regarding invitations and gift-giving. If you are sent a wedding invitation in which nothing is mentioned about “registry” or “gift options,” do not call and ask “where are you registered?” Just give whatever you think is appropriate.

That family might be following the old etiquette rule that considered it ‘vulgar’ to ‘ask’ for a gift. Even the mention of “no gifts” once implied that gifts were an expected obligation, though not required.

The upper classes would never have mentioned the word “gift” or “donations to a certain charity in lieu of gifts,” because certain rules of etiquette were understood, and any mention of them would imply that the receiver did not know the rules.

The reasons for this etiquette change are valid; nevertheless, some segments of society still question whether or not it is polite to tell a guest what should be given as a gift. If you are a recipient of an invitation from anyone who resists this change, at least you will understand his or her rulebook. Etiquette is about being comfortable wherever life takes you

Beauty Tips: Anti-Aging Tips

Crisco Vegetable vs Crème de La Mer — Go to to see the top notch rating of Crisco (the same vegetable shortening in your kitchen cupboard) over one of the most expensive facial creams: Crème de la Mer.

Some beauty skeptics have even applied their favorite expensive moisturizer to one half of the face and Crisco to the other for an overnight experiment. You can do the same and take a magnifying mirror the next morning to evaluate the results. You might just be surprised and switch to Crisco.

Phillipa Morrish is the president of Etiquette Training International.

Leave a Comment

Leave a Comment