Oh Orly: Week of December 19

December 18, 2013 Orly Amor
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Oh Orly!

No matter how many times I clean my house, my family does not respect me and clean up after themselves. It simply does not matter how often I tell them to do so!

What can I do to get them to respect me?

Natalie F.

Cobble Hill

Dear Natalie,

Well, there are two ways to go about this, one being a bit drastic in nature.

You do NO housecleaning and NO cooking and NO giving of any kind for a full week. This includes doing NO laundry, etc. After a week or during that same week, you might get some complaints and at that point your only answer needs to be, “I am not a maid.”

The second way you can deal with this is to have a family meeting to inform everyone that you are no longer going to do anything in the house and that everyone will have to fend for themselves. Then, take the week off — I would even say, if you can, leave for a week and let them really fend for themselves. Do NOT answer the phone. Do NOT call them back to see how they’re doing.

I know those two ways might sound very drastic. Humans in general don’t appreciate something until it is taken away from them. With children, when we give tough love, we take away the TV or the PlayStation or candy or whatever it is that they like to do unless they clean their room.

If we don’t stick to our guns, the children will continue to take advantage of our niceness and confuse it with weakness.

Keep this in mind – and I PROMISE you – you will only need to do this once. And if they stop respecting you again, remind them by doing it again or saying that you will do it again. Good luck!

All for the best,


Orly Amor

MBA International Public Speaker

Business and Personal Coach

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